the girl who is still in love

I say it every year: "I feel like I've known you forever, but we just met yesterday..."

Happy 8th Anniversary to us!

the girl who is twisted

My mother sent me an email with this video today. This is the text that was included with the email, which was a forward of a forward of a forward...

University of Iowa Farm Machine Music

This incredible machine was built as a collaborative effort between the Robert M. Trammell Music Conservatory and the Sharon Wick School of Engineering at the University of Iowa. Amazingly, 97% of the machines components came from John Deere Industries and Irrigation Equipment of Bancroft, Iowa, yes farm equipment!

It took the team a combined 13,029 hours of set-up, alignment, calibration, and tuning before filming this video but as you can see it was WELL worth the effort.

It is now on display in the Matthew Gerhard Alumni Hall at the University and is already slated to be donated to the Smithsonian.

So, after watching it again and again and again, I was entranced, but skeptical. Is this thing for real? It looks CG to me. So off I went to Snopes to check it out. And I was right! Further investigation reveals that I was right, it is CG.

So I get to pat myself on the back for being shrewd and observant, but at the same time...still be amazed! I mean, all the detail that is in this piece is completely AMAZING! Just being able to sync everything up sound, music, shadows, light...this is a completely astounding piece of computer art! So, enjoy it...but know what it is.

And while we are on the subject, let me just say, this is a weird quirk of mine. When someone sends me a forwarded email, I usually check it out. Not to truly share in what the sender is trying to share with me...but to prove them wrong. Twisted, yes I know. Snopes is one of my best friends on the web. If it's incredible or unbelievable, it probably is and Snopes has checked it out. Ironically, my mom is usually the one forwarding this stuff to me, but my Dad is the one who introduced me to the Snopes site. I find that funny.

Anyway, to continue with my twisted personality...I usually email a link from Snopes to the person who originally sent me the email. I guess I like to be able to say "I told you so..." indirectly because it's something that I try very hard not to do in person. Now what does this say about me and my personality?

Yeah, that's right. I'm twisted.

For the record, this isn't a new quirk. In Jr. High during the infamous "note wars" that pre-teen girls are prone to have (You know, the ones that read "you think you are so smart and so pretty, but you're NOT and nobody really likes you!") I would correct the note sender's spelling and grammar and send it back to them.

So I guess twisted goes back a long way!

the girl who is exhausted

4:45 am alarm goes off, drag self to bathroom to get ready for work

5:15 am leave for work, pick up Larry and Judy so Mom can go to dialysis

6:00 am arrive for work, go make coffee, pick up pastries and fruit cups, get store ready for opening

6:30 am open store

6:30 am - 1:00 pm whole lotta nothing, slow day, not much to do, leave early...but with a purpose

1:00 pm Larry comes back to pick me up, kids stayed home from school today...they caught my bug...the one I've had for two weeks. The one I won't go to the Dr. for because I'm afraid of antibiotics getting me pregnant again (explanation for Matthew)

1:48 pm arrive home, check mail on the way in--new CK and MM. Sweet! Change into something that is not a uniform and shoes that are not non-skid, steel toed...but look great and feel terrible after an hour

1:55 pm go to school for IEP meeting with speech therapist and school counselor

2:00 pm meeting: Ian's language development refuses to be categorized. He has an extensive vocabulary that he uses when asked to identify pictures....he even can grasp abstract concepts on the high end of his age range. However, he can't seem to use these words to put together sentences and follows no "normal" pattern. Therapist is determined, but frustrated.

2:35 pm leave meeting feeling frustrated too. Have copies of IEP report to give to independent speech therapist I have appointment with tomorrow

2:40 pm arrive home, call pediatrician to see if she can possibly squeeze kids in before closing time. No dice.

2:50 pm load kids into car to take Larsons back to their place, decide to take kids to After hours pediatrics nearby. They don't open until 5 pm soooo...

3:00 pm take kids to Great Clips in Target shopping plaza before Coo Pa is inspired to give them haircuts too. While there, stylist convinces me that she can fix Ian. (Did I mention Ian got a third haircut after Coo Pa's and Daddy's? Yeah, he took scissors to the remains of his hair--or someone helped him--and gave himself little leopard spots in the back. No pictures of that one. I'm DONE on the subject of haircuts) Zachary gets his Ashton Kutcher do trimmed, Matthew gets his surfer cut cleared from his eyes, and Ian...Ian is now a jarhead. Perhaps I will get a picture of that one.

4:00 pm didn't waste enough time, so off to Target (we happen to be next door, why not?) Stop by $1 spot and resist. urge. to. clean. place. out.

4:05-4:45pm wander Target aimlessly and somehow walk out $45 poorer.

4:45 pm attempt to leave Target...the Starbucks by the door lures me in for a Gingerbread latte. How did I spend another $21.00? Oh yeah. Advent calendar.

5:06 pm arrive at After Hours Peds after breaking Target spell

5:10 pm fill out three separate forms for three boys with one set of symptoms, one insurance carrier and one address, phone number and guardian info.

6:00 pm get called into exam area, Zack 51 lbs, Ian 35 lbs, Matthew 32 lbs Why is there only a 3lb difference between my 4 yo and my 3 yo? Is one too heavy or is the other too skinny? Should I find something real to worry about?

6:20 pm Dr. comes in. He is not one we have seen before. He probably shouldn't be working with kids. Diagnosis? Upper respiratory infection and Reactive Airway something...whatever, it sounds scary for kids who just seemed to have colds. Nebulizer treatments all around. Luckily, I still have a nebulizer from Ian's previous asthma therapy.


6:35 pm Doc leaves and we wait for prescriptions, excuse notes, etc.

6:46 pm leave AHP office and drive to...Target. Hey! It's close and their pharmacy is open until 9pm. Plus, I like the color coding and the cool red upside down bottles.

7:00 pm drop off prescriptions and go in search of something quick to eat in the Aisles of Target. Get distracted by their AWESOME soda selection, but disappointed they don't have Grapefruit Izze, just Black Currant and Pomegranate.

7:25 pm go back for prescriptions...they aren't ready. Decide at that point it would be a good idea to refill migraine medication. It is ready before kids' stuff is. I am starting to lose it but trying to avoid yelling at the little monsters who were too sick for school but well enough to rampage the aisles of Target when Mommy is running on little sleep, no food, lots of coffee and tight (but sexy) high heeled boots.

7:45 pm finally receive kids' medication. IT IS IN PREPACKAGED, SEALED BOXES!!! Why did it take 45 f*^&ng minutes to put this stuff into a bag?

8:08 pm arrive home again to 15 messages from hubby wondering where the hell I am.

8:15 pm kids are eating Spaghettios. Yes. I know. But THEY WANTED IT and it only took 45 seconds a pop to make them (and Mommy) happy. I am loading the dishwasher with last night's dishes.

8:30 pm the kids are done eating. The two youngest go off to the bath, the eldest sits down for his nebulizer treatment. This cycle repeats until all kids have had their turn. Realize that they will need to repeat this before and after school as well as the evening. Also realize that I will be leaving this up to Daddy and Coo Pa.

8:45 pm call out to work

9:16 pm Pajamas, lovies and tuck ins

9:28 pm call Mommy to gripe about bad day. Realize I am still wearing tight (but sexy) high heeled boots. Decide to leave them on because I know I will just be going out for Micky Dee's when DH gets home.

9:31 pm tuck kids in again after the last-ditch-attempt-to-stall potty run.

10:00 pm Hubby comes home starving because 1.) he didn't eat before work and 2.) I forgot to give him lunch money so he didn't eat AT work either. I am unsympathetic as I have yet to eat anything other than a single glazed Krispy Kreme sometime around 6:15 am.

10:05 pm leave for Micky Dee's and to fill dh's gas tank

10:19 pm arrive home with food, eat and watch dvr'd Criminal Intent. Very Good episode!

11:15 pm finally crack open CK. I debated between which to open first. Do I go for what I know will make me happy, or do I go for what I want to make me happy since the last issue sucked so hard core? I go with the known. I'll leave the unkown for when I'm bored.

12:35 am Suffer a hyperventilating episode. could. not. catch. my. breath. It freaked me out! (and totally ruined the mood of what was making me breathe heavy in the first place)

1:30 am quieting guilty voice in my head, I take a nebulizer treatment myself. Just in case. After all, the kiddos have 180 doses A PIECE, they can spare one for Mom.

It is now 2:20 am and either the Albuterol has made me hyper, or I am running on some weird sleep deprived high. I have just realized I have been up for nearly 22 hours. I'm off to have a smoke, look through my CK some more and try to go to sleep!

the girl who is just wrong

is it really wrong to think he would make a beautiful little girl?

shh...don't tell hubby I said that!

the girl who is thinking

Perhaps it's the spirit of Thanksgiving, but as I was reading the paper today, I was struck by how good I have it. Civil war is about to break out in Iraq, a 63 year old GRANDMOTHER blows herself up in Pakistan and her family is "proud." A guy takes two women hostage in Chicago on Thanksgiving--it ended badly. The usual "human face on the problem" stories about hunger, loss, abuse.

I have it pretty darn good.

I have three beautiful, smart children.

I have a husband who loves me (even if he doesn't clean house without a cattle prod)

I have a hobby that I love that allows me a creative outlet as well as a little bit of recognition.

I have friends who support and encourage and yes, gossip (we all need that!) with me.

I have a family in Florida that isn't by blood, but treats me as if I am.

I have a family in Texas that I miss so much, but who loves and supports me as if I was still under the same roof.

I have a job--it may not be the best, I may not be happy, but I am employed. And, I'm pretty confident I can get something better when I really pit my mind to it.

I have a place to live that is pretty nice (regardless of what my kids have done with it) and a pretty good landlord besides.

I have toys. These aren't "necessities" but I have them and they make me happy. A nice stash of sb'ing supplies, a dvr to recors shows so dh and I can watch them together, and a puter to surf the net.

I am thankful for all of these things and more. When I think about what I DON'T have, I am thankful too.

I don't have a terminal disease. I don't have an abusive relationship. I don't have an addiction (unless you count sb supplies) I don't have frostbite from sleeping on the streets. I don't have war in my front yard. I don't have danger in my life.

I am truly thankful for what I don't have.

And I pass that little nugget of philosophy on to you.

the girl who is planning

So apparently I have just agreed to host Thanksgiving dinner. I was planning on a small dinner for just us, but my bro-in-law and his girlfriend have no plans, so they are coming over. It was going to be simple and small and now with just two guests I feel the need to be more elaborate. I just made my grocery list and it feels enormous! Plus I work that day! But I'm out at 2 (possibly I can get out earlier) and I have Mon and Tues off, so it should be doable.

I hope.

So between now and then I need to go shopping, prep as many dishes as possible in advance and clean the house enough I'm not embarassed to have people over.

I will concede to paper plates and plastic forks though.

'What will your obituary say?' at QuizGalaxy.com

hee hee! I totally stole this off of Elsie's blog when I was doing my daily stalking. I guess that would be better than, "Beloved wiper of snot noses" I'm tagging the Jens to post their obits too!

the girl who is being quiet

My voice is fading in and out. It goes from husky/sexy to adolescent voice-changing-squeaky from sentence to sentence. DH says it's like nails on a chalkboard to him, so please don't talk.

Hmph!

He doesn't know me that well, does he? Its so damn hard NOT to talk!

lol!

Breaking out the NyQuil and the vaporizor with Vapo Steam.

the girl who mourns the loss

of her baby's beautiful hair! Friday, one of the teachers--with the best of intentions--mentioned to Coo-Pa that Ian was rubbing his eyes alot, it might be time for a trim. This is Ian before that comment. A little long, but beautiful!


So Coo-Pa--also with the best of intentions--decides that trimming bangs should be no big deal and he'll do it as a favor to me. Uh, yeah. This is Ian after Coo-Pa.


Then Aramis comes home, sees the hack job on his boy's hair (and we both loved Ian's hair) and goes ballistic. Next thing I know, he's hauling Ian off into the bathroom and I hear the "bzzz bzzz" of the clippers. This is Ian after Daddy's haircut.


The moral of the story? DON'T TOUCH MY KID'S HAIR!!!! Good intentions or no, just don't do it!

the girl who has decided

I'm no longer happy.

I am quitting my job.

Do you know what it's like to go in to talk to the higher ups about an issue you feel isn't being resolved and then have the issue dismissed and the meeting turned around into "you're on thin ice"

I've never been on thin ice before.

And it isn't even my performance...it's tardies.

And being put on the spot and asked, "what are you going to do and fix this?"

and only being able to answer "try harder to be on time?'

and not wanting to tell them everything that goes on in your life that makes it so damn difficult to get to work early--which is the expectation. And not wanting to say "if you dealt with what I did, you'd just be happy I got here at all!"

because you know they don't want excuses. Because you know that they don't really care. Because you really don't want to tell them anyway. And because you know you have been trying your ass off to get to work early even and it never happens.

And because you know you're at fault anyway and wouldn't accept these excuses from anyone else.

And still..you're so damn angry at them that they dismissed your problem entirely to focus on your faults you feel like just storming out right then and there. In fact, when I presented my problem, not only was it dismissed, I was told "I really thought you were going to talk to me about your attendance, not this."

I have never stormed out of a job.

But I so wanted to say, "You've made your position clear. While you're sitting there and telling me all the ways I'm a good worker. Alll the things I've done to make this place better. All the recognition and acknowledgement I have been craving for the over two years I've worked here and never gotten..you're still telling me that I'm close to losing my position for a non-performance based issue. Therefore, I should leave before you let me go and save you the cost of fighting my unemployment claim."

If I'm such a good worker, if I am so valuable, if I have contributed so much...why have I been denied SIX transfer requests?

why was I nominated for Employee of the Month by default?

Why was I never paid or acknowledged for work I did for the company AT HOME?

Why was I taken advantage of when "doing favors" and "just this one time" deals were tossed aside and it became expected, not rewarded. to such a point that when I complained I was told "well, we need to think of the business first."

I am not a valued employee. I am a position that they don't have to train someone else to do.

and I am pissed and upset.

and I am leaving.


*******
edited: ten minutes later, the world is a happy place again.

I got another pub!

toot!

the girl who runs a looney bin

So the kids are running around wild in the house playing "zombies" and Aramis stops Zack and asks him:

"Do you love your brothers?"

Z: "Yeah, I love them. Even when they cause trouble, they're pretty cool"

A: "You know you've caused some trouble yourself!"

Z: " Yeah, I know. Sometimes I stumble."