Wednesday, January 11, 2006

the girl who is has resolutions...

Ok, first things first. I haven't exactly been keeping up with this whole blog thing. And the excuse is pretty much the same for any other thing in my life that goes undone or gets done late...I'm busy. So, in a nutshell, the last couple of weeks:

The year turned and I was driving home from work when it happened. Made me stop and wonder how many of these I would miss with my family because of work. So, New Year's Resolution number one: when certain circumstances have been resolved, I am looking for a new job. If I have to work, let it be a nine to fiver, Mon-Fri.

The scrapbook mojo has left me. I have plenty of projects, and have even had some time. But just no urge, I think I used it all up on an album for hire at Christmas. Don't get me wrong: the album was gorgeous (if I do say so myself) but I think it was the pressure of completing a 20 page album in a week's time that makes me want to sit back and not touch the mounds of projects I have. New Year's Resolution #2: I will try to scrap, and I will try to catch up, but I will not feel guilt if I cannot attain my goals. I will scrap for the love of scrapping, not to reach an unattainable ideal.

On a plus side, my private resolution (#3) of getting published is coming true! Some really wonderful ladies from 2Peas invited me (and many other talented scrappers) to submit for a book to be published on Reality Scrapbooking. I got the news today that from the over 1,000 entries from wonderfully talented ladies, my submission was one of the 80 they chose to be published. I was floored! And completely excited! And the news was enough to drag me out of my little self-pity rut I've been trapped in. Here's one of the best parts, the book has been picked up for publication by Memory Makers! (which for those non-scrappers out there, is a major name in Scrapbooking publishing) So little happy dance for me.

My middle son has started pre-school. He just turned three and is going to half days to receive speech therapy. I'm a little sad, since I really thought I had until he was four, but he is doing well and who am I to let my emotions stand in the way of him learning to communicate better? It's just part of being a mommy I guess.

And then there is the state of all things electrical in my house: my tv is broken, my computer is broken, my cell phone is get the idea. A little discouraging. It seems this all happens when Christmas is over and we're out of play funds. Sigh! At least tax-returns are coming soon, and bonus from work. I really had other plans for that. Oh well.

Lately I've been feeling ...unsatisfied. There's jsut no other way to put it. I have the elements of what I think I want in life, but things aren't the way I want them to be. I have a wonderful family, but I don't get to spend the time I want with them. I have a cute little condo, but I rent and would really prefer a house of my own. I have a job that's ok, but I feel I'm not paid what I'm worth, my talents are wasted and I'm not really happy there. The company is a good one, but just not the particular position I'm in. So I guess Resolution #4 is to try and find ways to get the happiness back.

Right now though, I'm having a pity party, so if you'd like to come the tea is on me.